Month After Month

I was asked the other day what it felt like to carry the weight of infertility.  The question stopped me in my tracks.  I had no idea how to answer that.   How could I possibly put into words the emotions I have been feeling and experiencing for the last four years?  How do you…

Trust

For those of you who have been reading my blog, you know that patience is definitely not my strong suit.  I truly believe that during this infertility journey, God has been testing my patience and just exactly how much I trust in Him and His plan.  I have failed miserably at this test!  I think…

“The Shack”

If you haven’t seen “The Shack” yet, I highly recommend you head to the movies tonight!  I went over the weekend with Jayson and his family and then went again with a couple of my friends.  It’s amazing.   It really makes you think….and cry! The movie helped answer so many questions for me.  I never quite…

Prisoner to Infertility

I feel like a prisoner!   As I have said so many times before, this journey isn’t for the weak.   When I have weak moments I start second guessing everything.  Are we doing the right thing?  Should we be investing our money in our home that so desperately needs it?  Are we getting behind on projects that needs…

Let Him In

I saw the above picture when I was browsing on Pinterest and it got me pretty emotional.   There has been a lot going on lately along with the infertility that I have felt like there is nothing good in the world anymore.   I have been becoming very bitter and letting these trials take over my life.  I’m not sure…

Feeling Stuck

Last night I had an overwhelming feeling of pure sadness.  I had this intense feeling that all our friends and family were moving on with their lives and felt as though Jayson and I are stuck.   We have friends and family getting married, having babies, taking trips with their family, making improvements on their house and Jayson and I…

Strength

One thing that I’m told often is how strong I am.  It’s also one thing that I get frustrated hearing.  I know everyone is coming from a good place but that strength sometimes I feel is a show to the world.  To the world I put on a smile and go about my day like…

“Even If”

“They say sometimes you win some, sometimes you lose some and right now, right now, I’m losing bad.” Do you ever hear a song and it just hits you at your core?  Jayson had been telling me about a new song by MercyMe, “Even If”, that he heard on the radio.  He said he really…